Sometimes In Hat: The Ballad of Samurai Jack
by Kiki Cabou
Summary: A minstrel makes up a song and pays for it. Dearly. But don't be blue, 'cause hope springs eternal in the end. ;D


Hey, peeps. It's Kiki again. Okay --- I've been inspired by an American folk song. This one's a humor piece, and it's also waaaay shorter than The Village at the End of the Earth. *grins*  
  
I'm posting this a second time, because the first time I posted I was nearly unconscious and kind of grouchy. Hence the "summary." I'm usually not that flippant, I swear. I don't know what came over me.  
  
Anywho, thanks so much to Ahmose Nefertari Smith and Kerro Starbane for your kind reviews.  
  
Thank you also to SJO for writing in and saying that the 'language' was unappreciated. That comment got me to go back and fix the work. So now, hopefully, it's better, tighter, less offensive, etc. If it's not, just write in and tell me.  
  
Thanks, and enjoy.  
  
Disclaimers: Claiming nothing. Dissin' Aku.  
  
Summary: A minstrel makes up a song. Things don't go well for him after that. ;)  
  
Rating: PG.  
  
Category: Vignette, Humor, Slight Drama.  
  
***  
  
Sometimes In Hat: The Ballad of Samurai Jack  
  
***  
  
Bernie, a wandering minstrel, sat down in the town square of Ubedizzah. Ubedizzah was a little hamlet near one of the many Aku-occupied cities on earth, and Bernie much preferred the small towns to the big cities. Bernie played the guitar and sang, and survived off of tips that people threw into his guitar case. Bernie was a brave soul that way.  
  
Bernie was also not only a good musician, but good company near a campfire. He'd been around thousands of them on his travels, and he'd heard a lot of stories. Most of them held his interest, but he'd been utterly captivated by the tales of Samurai Jack, a man who was wandering the earth helping people and trying, singlehandedly, to stop Aku.  
  
Bernie admired Jack. So, right there in the town square of Ubedizzah, he made up a little song, to the tune of "Sweet Betsy From Pike." His mother had taught him the melody long ago. He just started strumming chords, and made up the words as he went along.  
  
"Did you ever hear about Samurai Jack?  
  
He wanders the earth to save folks from attack!  
  
Without e'en a compass, he knows where he's at,  
  
The wanted ads read that he's 'sometimes in hat.'"  
  
He sang a little chorus: "Singin' hey nakka, ho nakka, hey nakka, hey! Singin' hey nakka, ho nakka, hey nakka, hey!"  
  
By then, a few girls had stopped to listen to him. They dropped a few coins into his case. Encouraged, Bernie went on.  
  
"His blade's made of steel and his heart's made of gold,  
  
He follows 'bushido,' least that's what I'm told!  
  
He swipes and he slashes, it's such a fine sight,  
  
Too bad he don't have no sweet woman at night."  
  
He sang the chorus and the girls, who had been joined by their friends, blushed and tittered.  
  
"He's out in the woods or he's down by the lake,  
  
He'd take down the Shogun with socks and a rake!  
  
He just wants to kill him and find some way home,  
  
'Cause the bastard refuses to leave Jack alone."  
  
The sympathy ploy worked. "Awww"s poured out, and coins rained down into his guitar case as he sang the chorus. Then came another verse.  
  
"We wanna be happy, he's all we've got left,  
  
And hell, if he died, we would all be bereft!  
  
But no one can take him, not even Aku,  
  
He's got us behind him, he knows what to do!"  
  
He sang the chorus and the gathered crowd sang along, cheering and waving and throwing coins.  
  
"So he is our hope and we hope he succeeds,  
  
From you girls he's got all the love that he needs,  
  
His quest is unfinished, but I'll fade to black,  
  
So far, that's the ballad of Samurai Jack!"  
  
"Singin' hey nakka, ho nakka, hey nakka, hey! Singin' hey nakka, ho nakka, hey nakka, hey!"  
  
The girls were screaming like they were at a rock concert, and pelting Bernie with coins. The sun was shining. His guitar case was so full of money that he had no room for his instrument. He was feeling rich, and thinking about buying a beer tonight. Or perhaps a house.  
  
And then the cheering died away. A shadow fell over Bernie and the crowd ran, screaming in fright. Bernie gulped and looked behind him.  
  
There stood a VERY angry Aku.  
  
"BASTARD?!!!" he roared at Bernie. "You DARE praise that worthless Samurai and call the Shogun of Sorrow such a rude name?! RAAAAUGH!"  
  
He turned his demonic eyeballs on Bernie and vaporized him.  
  
"Worthless musicians," Aku snorted.  
  
Just for good measure, he turned and blasted the crap out of Bernie's guitar. Then he shape-shifted into a bat and flew away. The frightened crowd of girls came out of hiding, stunned and scared. All that remained of the minstrel was a heap of smoking ashes.  
  
But out of the crowd came a strong, sweet soprano voice, singing Bernie's ballad. The musician himself might have been short-lived, but his song would never die. The soprano lit into the first verse with gusto.  
  
"Did you ever hear about Samurai Jack?  
  
He wanders the earth to save folks from attack.  
  
Without e'en a compass, he knows where he's at,  
  
The wanted ads read that he's 'sometimes in haaaaaaaat!'"  
  
***  
  
The End.  
  
I apologize in advance (of flames) about Bernie. Aku is evil. You expected something else to happen?  
  
I asked in my first post if this was a song fic. I was very kindly told (by Ahmose Nefertari) that it was, and that this can even be called "filking."  
  
*sigh* I'm about as comfortable with internet lingo as Jack is with elevators. With any luck, filking isn't illegal. LOL Thanks for reading!  
  
Kiki  
  
PS: Someone commented that my happy Jack face looked like half of a television set. So here is a revised version. -[: ) 


End file.
